I think the “mommy war” is a battle that rages INSIDE each parent – that internal battle between guilt and sanity – between “perfection” and reality. Between what family life is supposed look like (calm and pretty and Pinterest!) and what family life actually looks like (chaos and messy and Survivor!). Those of us who can’t handle that tension take the war from inside to outside – and start to judge and project and lash out at others. We defend our circumstances by snarking about people in different circumstances.”
Report finds that fragmented time and long, mental checklists add to fatigue, but that moms find work meaningful.
Day 10: A Year of Having it All
Feeling very disempowered at work these days. It’s a real bummer. It’s the only thing in my life that makes me angry - not earning what I know I’m worth…what I made before this recession hit. (Are we still in a recession?) Daughter is darling, a joy. I love the quality time I get to spend with her at the start and end of each day. I am so grateful for my romantic relationship with my husband and for our friendship. Terrible dreams last night, about attacks and vulnerability and magic. Feeling on the cusp of a transformation…
Day 9: A Year if Having it All
I just watched The Way, a movie about a spiritual pilgrimage, and I am left feeling profound and expansive and inspired, and grateful for art, and craving travel. I want to follow in my friend Trish’s footsteps and show my daughter the world - me, Jordan, & Alison, traveling.
Today was hectic, between work and childcare, but I forced myself to stop working at 7pm and relax and watch a movie and I’m so glad I did - my mood and outlook are transformed, which makes me want to follow in my friend Catherine’s footsteps and write a novel - something that can have the effect this movie had on me, on someone else.
I found out that a team I’m working with won a big project. I’m equally excited and scared. Excited because of the income and because it’s interesting, creative work for a worthwhile cause - that’s rare. Scared because it means a commitment, and for some reason, that scares me. I hate being pinned down. I just want someone to pay me to write and perform and create - silly and childish and naive, I know, but the heart wants what it wants.
Good snuggle time with my dog today, and a good catch up call with a girlfriend I’ve known since kindergarten - she’s like a sister to me.
Now off to join my husband in bed. TO READ, people. To read.
"You don’t choose a life. You live a life." - The Way